Last night, for the first time in about a week, I slept for more than 2 hours in a row. Consequently, I vaguely resemble a human being today and have therefore decided to brave some contact with the outside world.
Hello, outside world! How have you been? Has anything interesting or exciting happened while I have been in this fog?
Also — a topic for discussion. I have started to feel a little out of place among the moms in the playgroup we attend. Obviously, we’re all stay-home parents, but the others seem more committed (for lack of a better word) than I am.
For me, the decision to stay home was mostly a practical one. Paying for daycare for three kids under the age of three, let alone finding a suitable daycare with room for two newborns at the same time (or trying to shuttle the kids to two or three different places) just wasn’t reasonable. So I quit my job. It’s not that I don’t enjoy spending time with my kids, or that I’m not grateful for the opportunity to do it. But under other circumstances, I would’ve hired a nanny or put them in daycare, and I’d be OK with that, too.
So, I don’t know quite what to say* when I hear things like, “I wonder sometimes if so-and-so’s kids are so ‘easy’ because she put them in daycare and went back to work so early. They never had anyone doting on them 24-7, so maybe they’ve learned to be more easy-going…. Of course, you’d never WANT that.”
You wouldn’t? I don’t get it. Isn’t it good for their family that going back to work was successful for them? And if you see some sign that your own kids are being over-mommied, then that’s to do with you, not anyone else, yes?
OK, discuss among yourselves.
*I don’t really feel the need to SAY anything. These are all good women and good moms. I just find the difference in perspective interesting.