The path not taken

ETA: The links aren’t working.  Too much traffic, perhaps.  Here’s what happened: http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/05/03/parenting-an-addicted-child/.  Henry died yesterday.

The thing with parenthood is, you don’t know on Monday when you chastise your daughters for cutting off all their Barbies’ hair that on Tuesday you’ll discover that one of them has cut up her Tinkerbell dress.  And you’ll wish you had known, because if you had you would have taken away the scissors on Monday.  Or made the punishment stricter, or the lecture longer.  And maybe it would’ve prevented Tinkerbell’s demise.

And you won’t know, when your teenage son confesses to marijuana use, whether it’s simple experimentation or the first step on a tragic journey.  If you’d known, maybe you would’ve done it differently.  But even then, you wouldn’t know for sure whether it was working, or where the road was leading.

Obviously, those two things are not the same.  It’s just:

You make the best choice you can make, today, with the information at hand and the emotions of the moment.  And you pray that someday it’ll all make sense.  And you let another mother’s tragedy break your heart a little, because she is brave and her son was beautiful and no matter how she got there we are all in this together.

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About Grape

I've got the world's best kids and husband. Great house, steady job. I'm living the American dream. The trick is to appreciate it. I'm working on that part.
This entry was posted in Bloggity, Grape, Parenting and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to The path not taken

  1. Very touching and sad… I make light of my own battles sometimes… it’s either that or cry… but if I was a parent, I would make sure my kids knew that, no matter what, they could come to me and tell me the truth and I would move the earth and the heavens to do whatever it was that had to be done… No matter how old they were… Even if it meant they were going to hate my stinking guts for a while. I was 31 when I went down that road and I am one of the lucky few who survived to see the other end of that dark tunnel. Talk to your kids… it’s never too soon. It can, however, be too late…

  2. Although, I don’t know if anyone could have saved me if I didn’t want to be saved… I guess it’s like you said… you do your best with the information at hand…

  3. Pingback: The path not taken (via Fruit Salad) « Tone Deaf, Color Blind, Day Late and a Dollar Short

  4. Pingback: A Blog Memory Album of Henry

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